How do I describe this day. I can't say that it wasn't good. But I can't say that it was bad. I can't honestly say that I messed up. I can say that I disappointed my Self. I did not let my Self lead. I was not mindful, I was egotistic, I was not even there for many points at the time.
I was not discreet. I was fearful. I was not in the moment.
As I type this I feel the inner person nodding in agreement. See? I told you that this was happening when it was happening!
I got the warning.
Trying to understand the lessons in the lousy-ness of the day.
As I look within and check my energy, I can hear it. We can always try again.
Sigh.
I know, but why does it feel like two steps back and only half a step forward?
That is the process. My former mentor once asked me a question and I reminded him of a lesson. He thanked me. I asked him, "You are a smart guy and I am not dumb. Why do we forget." He said, "Robert, I will tell you why because humans are f---ing stupid!"
ReplyDeleteI prefer to think we are forgetful.