For the Love of my Soul

I don't know if I am supposed to share this next bit, because believe it or not it is copyrighted material, but I am going to post it, for the record, and because I trust that no one will turn me in for copying this onto my blog.* The strange thing is that these are the words of a spirit, a being who was channeled at that wonderful New Age conference that I went to last month in Colorado. It was one of the things that was said during the whole weekend that made the greatest impression on me, because I felt these words as if my own Soul was speaking them. I don't know.

Anyway, the being who speaks is an aspect of one of the Ascended Masters, St. Germain, the keeper of the seventh Ray (for you hardcore creators!). I trust this channel explicitly.

Imagine for a moment two walls about 30 feet high, about 10 meters high. Two walls going up very tall. Open at the top, but so tall that they’re almost not letting in any light. And imagine that these walls are very close together, and imagine that this alleyway, this very narrow alleyway going down through in between these two walls seems to go on forever. You can’t see the end. It just goes and goes and goes. Maybe making little twists and turns.

 And you are in this alley, but it is so narrow, these walls so close, you can barely fit through. You have to go sideways. So close together, because you’re shoulders are too broad. So you have to go sideways. So close that you can barely breathe. So close that you can’t even turn your head, can’t move it from side to side. So tight that you can only move one leg forward followed by the other leg. You can’t take one step in front of the other. Just one leg and then the other following behind it. So compressed and tight that it’s claustrophobic, terrifying almost. And it also appears that with each step that you feel compelled to take moving forward, that it’s getting narrower. A little narrower.

It was at this point when I began to realize who he was talking about. I somehow knew what this was like, and what he was relaying was an experience that he himself had already had:

But you have to keep moving, because you know if you stop, those walls are going to come in even closer and tighter. You can’t turn your head back to see what’s behind you. There’s not enough room. So you just keep taking a step – little steps, barely breathing, but afraid of stopping, because then the walls will come in.

 My dear friends, that’s what your soul feels like, your I Am feels like. That’s that thing that’s been calling out to you, this thing that is radiant and expressive and huge, but trapped inside these two walls. Going where? It doesn’t matter, because you can’t stop. Can’t go back, so you just keep going through the program a little forward, a little more each time.

Then he kind of raged at us for being full of shit, for whining about how we are uncomfortable in this world, that we lie when we say it's all right, that we have no idea, because we really don't. 

If this experience he describes is correct and true, if the Soul is descending into form, this form, my form, and I am ascending as well, and casting aside the Ego and part of my "Self" in order to become who I Am, then this place is where it all began, the place where there is no turning back, where the Fifth Dimensional Being is committed to creating Herself, and moving forward between the walls that separate the dimensions, squeezing infinity into being here, low density, from the realm of energy and thought.

What a risk, what a love! Why would she do that? 

For me? For her creation?

What insanity.

Anyway, this story, from an embodied spirit, is what stayed with me. I bellyache, as I do now, about how difficult I have it, swinging between third and fifth dimension, shitty days, doubt, heavy, no fun, no love. 

And I believe that I can always turn around and run away when it really gets tough.

But my Soul, my Soul, does she have that choice?

Do I?

(*copyright held by Geoffrey Hoppe, 2012)